A simple way to stabilize your mood and the mood in your household
How has the mood of your household been during this season? Most of us have been feeling the ups and downs that move us from stressed out to a strange peacefulness to taking care of life as usual – sometimes all within the same hour. And when you couple that with the mood instability that others in your household are feeling, the mood of the whole household is truly like riding a roller coaster!
One thing that will not work is to tell everyone to get into a better mood. If you want to help yourself out and lead your household well, incorporate this simple exercise each day: Active Appreciation.
This is more than just positive thinking or even gratitude. Active Appreciation involves focusing your mind and heart on someone or something that evokes positive feelings of value and then actively sharing your gratitude. What stirs your appreciation can be something quite small – a kind gesture, someone’s smile, a quality that you admire. Taking a few moments each day to actively appreciate others in your life will stabilize your own mood and positively affect their mood.
What are the steps of active appreciation? Start by paying attention to what is good, valuable, and positive around you. Focus your thoughts on one thing at a time and notice how your heart feels toward it for several seconds. Then share it by telling someone, writing it down, or speaking it aloud. If others are able to join you in taking time to actively appreciate, both your appreciation and theirs will grow exponentially.
How does this work? Appreciation releases oxytocin, which is a counter to the stress hormone, cortisol. When stress and worry increases, our brain signals to the body to release cortisol. When we spend several minutes in active appreciation, we release oxytocin, which turns off our cortisol production. This decreases our heart rate, lowers our blood pressure, and stabilizes our mood.
A Special Note for Parents or Couples:
Play the Appreciation Game! Take turns naming one thing you appreciate about something or someone in your life right now. Give several seconds in between to allow each person time to think of something and notice how their heart feels. Keep going until everyone has exhausted their list – there are no losers, only winners in better moods!
