A simple way to regain a sense of agency. In a time of uncertainty, how can we make choices to regain our sense of agency? Don’t miss the Special Note for Parents!
During this time of uncertainty, trauma science experts tell us we are living under a pre-traumatic cloud. Trauma can occur when we feel unable to do anything to change a situation. This leads to feelings of helplessness and powerlessness, and can cause us to feel immobilized. We can counter these feelings by regaining our sense of agency. Within this time of uncertainly, we still have choices!
According to Wikipedia, “In social science, Agency is defined as the capacity of individuals to act independently and to make their own free choices.” A simple way to regain agency is to add structure to our life.
Structure provides boundaries and expectations, like dividing up the days and setting simple goals for taking action. For example, tomorrow at 8:00am, I am going to make myself breakfast. At 12:30pm, I am going to join a friend for lunch online. Making choices to exercise our agency will add predictability to our life, and predictability counters trauma.
A Special Note for Parents:
Use predictability to help your kids – you can play video games from X time to Y time. You can play outside for 1 hour. We will eat dinner as a family, with no phones or TV, at X time. Between X and Y, we will all practice quiet in the house. Each Tuesday night is family game night.
Let your kids gain some agency too – ask them for the time in which they will do a certain activity. Let them schedule a favorite activity for their day tomorrow.
